Turning Triggers into Triumphs: Embracing the Path to Growth
My son used to evoke powerful emotions in me—particularly when he ignored my guidance or did exactly the opposite of what I asked. These intense reactions were my first clue that something deeper was at play, though I didn’t realize it then. It’s easy to project our triggers outward, especially when facing them means confronting unresolved parts of ourselves. Turning inward to explore these triggers can be uncomfortable, but it’s also where real growth begins.
Growing up, I was taught to suppress anger, a lesson that left a lasting impact. I learned early that anger was something “bad” and should be hidden, not felt. So, whenever anger surfaced, I resisted it, tucking it away as if it were something shameful or invalid.
Imagine carrying that weight for years—it eventually began to take its toll on my body, which shouldered the burden of these unexpressed emotions.
My son, though, didn’t share my hesitation around anger. As he developed his personality, he expressed both joy and frustration with equal intensity. Witnessing this unfiltered expression was challenging, yet it also illuminated how much anger I had been suppressing within myself.
I began to experiment with ways to release this pent-up energy. Writing, being in nature, dancing, and journaling helped me finally channel my emotions healthily. Little by little, my perception of anger shifted; I realized that wishing my emotions away had only intensified them.
Instead, by creatively expressing and moving through them, I felt lighter, as though the weight of the world was lifting from my shoulders.
Welcome to this edition of the EQ Oasis Newsletter, created for those of you seeking a deep dive into emotional intelligence and resilience.
This week, we’re exploring how we can stop running away from emotional pain and transform it into purpose. How do we begin to feel the emotions we’ve suppressed or numbed?
For years, I stored away my pain, acting as though it didn’t exist. But as I discovered during my burnout, unacknowledged emotions eventually surface in ways that do not serve us. When the body refuses to cooperate with the mind, we have no choice but to listen. My body needed to process these emotions I had been ignoring so I could finally release them and unburden my emotional backpack.
This process isn’t easy, and it varies for everyone. But I hope that sharing my journey might offer insight or guidance on your own path. Perhaps, like me, you’re holding onto past emotions that weigh heavily on your heart. Letting go of these burdens doesn’t erase life’s challenges or difficult emotions—it simply makes them feel lighter.
As you read this week’s newsletter, I invite you to approach it with an open heart and compassion for yourself. This journey may bring emotions to the surface, but give yourself the space to feel them without judgment or a need to label them. Feeling all our emotions is what makes us human.
Are you ready? Let’s dive in.
The journey from resisting my emotions to embracing them
This week, I want to share some reflections from my life journey that I've captured in hopes that they resonate with you. Life is a complex journey filled with challenges, and one of the most significant lessons I've learned is how to stop running away from emotional pain and start embracing it. Our emotions, when left unchecked or avoided, can spiral into larger issues that weigh heavily on our well-being. Over the course of my life, I discovered how to transform these challenges into empowerment and growth.
Understanding the Duality of Emotions
I grew up believing in strict binaries: good versus bad behavior leading to rewards or punishment. This simplistic view of duality often perpetuates emotional suffering. By learning to make conscious decisions and owning my consequences, I began to live more peacefully. This awareness and sovereignty over one's choices can alter the trajectory of our emotional health.
At fourteen, I faced overwhelming emotional turmoil, feeling out of place even within my family. This pivotal experience taught me about the strength and importance of facing our emotional pains head-on. When running away seemed like an option, reality brought clarity, showing me the love and support I feared were absent. It was a moment that reshaped my understanding and relationship with my emotions and my family.
Trauma can lead to self-reliance as a defense mechanism, forming a pattern that can interfere with forming deep connections. By shifting from survival mode to thriving, I learned to genuinely connect with others. Realizing that anticipation and vigilance weren't sustainable ways to live, I looked inward to address my unease.
The Path to Emotional Resilience
So, how do we move forward? Here's what worked for me:
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- Deep Dive: Exploring the Power of Healing your Triggers
- Action Steps, Affirmations and Reflection Prompts
- How to Set Boundaries for a Higher Quality of Life
- Soulful Moment: Inspirational Poem
- Your EQ Vitamins for the week
- Looking Ahead & Stay Connected